2015: The year I behaved.

Saying goodbye to 2015… the year I did everything I was supposed to do.

I got fit. My research told me that the most efficient way to stay strong and healthy, prevent injury and increase energy is weightlifting. So I did that. It worked. My energy level is higher than it has ever been, my body doesn’t hurt all the time, and I think I look fly. Probably spend too much time looking in the mirror, oh well.

I ate healthy. Maybe not every week, but more often than not. Lentils, rice, good spices, fresh vegetables, lean meat, beans. I cooked a huge pot of something every week for weeks at a time. Learned how to make stuff tasty without spending too much money. Learned how much smarter I get when I’m eating fibre and protein instead of sugar and starch. Cool.

I kept my finances in order. No debt, healthy savings. I researched how to invest and use money wisely, and kept my perspective on the fact that money isn’t actually worth anything. It got hectic towards the end – one week my house got robbed, the next I needed glasses and physio. Then Christmas happened and there were a lot of people I needed to appreciate, in gift form. Doesn’t matter, good habits make it possible to fuck up sometimes and not sink your boat.

I reached out to people. Did a lot of rock climbing and swimming at lakes with friends. Had some very raw conversations that wouldn’t have been possible if I hadn’t learned how to stop denying the fact that I have emotions, and be honest about them. I asked people to do stuff instead of waiting for them to call.

I wished, as sincerely as I do every year, that people would call more often instead of me having to track them down. But this year I stopped waiting and went looking, and more often than not I found that people had been waiting for me.

That was cool. I’m blessed with two solid best friends, Corrie and Shane, whom I love with all my heart. May they someday meet, and may they not automatically hate one another.

I worked on a new skill. Practiced drawing. My drawing still looks pretty childish but I’m inspired by some amazing artists I know. Kahla Lichti, Klara Woldenga, Matt Osborn. I’ll never be as good as any of them, but maybe I’ll learn a way to express myself and reach people I can’t get to with writing.

I got my heart thoroughly broken. Three times. Have not recovered yet.

I did all the things I was supposed to do, but this year is ending pretty sad for me. Above are the highlights. I’m trying not to think about all the bad dates, missed jokes, missed confessions, lies (mostly me, lying to myself), hours lost to internet surfing, and idiotic problems with expensive solutions.

Did I spend $600 on corner marker covers for my shit-beat Tercel?

Did I let myself get hung up on an ex I broke up with years ago?

Did I start a fight with a random stranger at the polo court?

Did I buy a motorcycle for a man that I was not, strictly speaking, in love with?

Did I leave my door unlocked when I left for a five-day weekend?

Yeah… yeah.

It was weird. I think, maybe, I got the interesting life that I wished for last Christmas.

Goodbye, 2015. Don’t come back.

Published by

Shannon Graham

Shannon has been writing brief essays and occasional how-to articles at Rocketships, Unaffiliated (.ca) whenever inspiration strikes, since 2012. She is interested in your opinion.

4 thoughts on “2015: The year I behaved.”

  1. $600, eh? Ouch.

    I have a ton of respect for you, Shannon. Kind of wish I’d been there for the stranger polo court incident… sounds kind of awesome, not knowing anything about it.

    Here’s to a perfect combination of interesting and excellent for 2016, and many years to follow.

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